You Already Died Once

Summary: When Yusuke intends to try and stop Kurama from using the book and losing his life, Kuwabara steps in to stop him. They might be rivals, but Yusuke died once already - and Kuwabara has no intention of letting that happen again
Warning(s): Spanking; spoilers for the live action version of YuYu Hakusho; references to violence and canon character death; AU

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Yusuke stared at Kuwabara's hand on his arm, but it was only for a second or two before he was shrugging it off. His eyes were fixed on the door that showed the way into the hospital room. He had to tell Kurama the cost that using the book would demand from him. Maybe it wouldn't make a difference...if it was Yusuke's own mother in that position, he didn't think it would make a difference to him...but Kurama needed to know. Because his mother would hate it if she lived and her son died.

Yusuke had seen the pain his own untimely death had caused his own mother.

"Yusuke." Kuwabara's voice was merely a growl and he reached out, grabbing Yusuke's arm and pulling him back. "If you go in there, you'll get yourself killed! It's a trap."

Yusuke tried to shrug off Kuwabara's hand again, but he was listening to the other man. Did he think Kurama wanted to kill him? No. The yokai could have done that at any point. He'd known that Yusuke was following him, after all.

But was it possible that the book would take his life instead of Kurama's? Was it possible to help the yokai save his mother in that way?

He didn't have time. As soon as Kurama made his wish, the book would act and would take his life in exchange for his mother's. And Kuwabara was holding him back...preventing him from going in to help.

Yusuke balled up his fist, intending to punch the other man.

Kuwabara pulled him forward, pulling him off balance, and swatted his backside. Hard.

Yusuke's eyes widened, and a shocked yell escaped him. He tried to jerk his arm out of Kuwabara's grip, but the other man's hold was too strong. "What the hell do you think you're doing?!" he demanded furiously. "I need to get in there!" The sting of the swat hadn't lingered, but the action confused him. He was used to Kuwabara fighting with him. Not hitting him like he was a misbehaving child.

"You're not going in there!" Kuwabara glanced towards the door, and a grim look came over his face. He pulled Yusuke closer to him, yanking him off balance, and delivered another sharp smack to his backside.

Yusuke struggled, but it was half-hearted at best. He could easily fight Kuwabara off. He'd done it plenty of times before he'd died and been brought back to life, after all. Violence had been the only way the two of them had related to each other for a long time.

But Kuwabara wasn't hitting him. He wasn't fighting him. Yusuke didn't know why he was actually spanking him, though. He gave an experimental tug on his arm, but there was a strange feeling inside. Like he didn't want to be let go. "This isn't what you think, Kuwabara. He's not trying to hurt anyone. But if I don't stop him, he's going to get himself killed." His voice was calm...calmer than the situation really called for.

"And what about you?" There was a strange edge to Kuwabara's voice. It kind of sounded like anger, but not exactly. If Yusuke didn't know better, he would have thought it was fear.

But why was Kuwabara scared about him heading into the hospital room after Kurama?

"What about me what?" Yusuke asked, needing to know exactly what Kuwabara meant. He needed to know why the other man was doing this. Because the reason would cement his decision about how to respond. It would tell him if he needed to fight back...or if he needed to respond in a different way.

"If you go in there after him, are you going to die again?"

There it was. The same note of fear Yusuke had recognised in his mother...in Keiko. It made any decision to fight drain out of him and he let himself lean slightly into the hand on him. "He's not like the yokai who are attacking," he said. "His mother, his human mother, is dying. He wants to save her life. But if he does, he'll die. She'll lose him."

Kuwabara shook his head slowly, his grip loosening slightly on Yusuke's arm, but not letting go. "You'll stop him from sacrificing himself to save her...but will he listen to you? If he's so desperate to save her, he'll just go ahead with it. It won't matter what you tell him. He went so far as to steal that book for her, after all."

Yusuke shook his head. "How do you know about that?"

"I saw you talking to that weird girl." Kuwabara glanced towards the hospital room and then at Yusuke. "What are you going to do? Do you even have a plan?"

"I'm going to give half of my own life," Yusuke replied. The plan had only been half-formed in his mind, but with Kuwabara outright asking him what he planned to do, the idea took root and became fully formed.

"You're going to die? Again?" Kuwabara's eyes widened.

"No, of course not." Yusuke cast an almost desperate look at the hospital room. If he waited for much longer, Kurama would make his wish and end up sacrificing his own life to save his mother's. "I need to go in there, Kuwabara. If you need to talk to me...if you need to make me answer for whatever it is you think I've done wrong...can you wait until after I've done this? Please?" He lowered his balled fist. There was no point in threatening Kuwabara. He could tell how worried the other man was...he could tell that Kuwabara was scared, even if he'd never admit that to Yusuke or anyone else.

Kuwabara stared into his eyes for a long moment, his grip still firm on Yusuke's arm. Finally, though, he let go. "You need to take more care, Yusuke. I'll be waiting out here for you."

There wasn't time for Yusuke to do more than nod once in understanding before he ducked into the hospital room.

It was immediately obvious that Kurama had already started the ritual to save his mother. Yusuke could feel the dark magic moving inside the hospital room...and the moment he stepped inside, he was surrounded by darkness and shadows.

Kurama had already begun the ritual. Yusuke could only hope that it wasn't too late.

"Listen to me!" Yusuke yelled the words, hoping that the book...or whatever power that drove it...would hear him and understand. "Take half of my life as well!"

"What?" Kurama's head jerked up...and he stared at Yusuke, his eyes wide and shocked.

There was no chance to explain. Yusuke felt the power of the book rip through him and he cried out, feeling his energy sapped. As the darkness receeded, he slowly dropped to his knees...feeling almost as weakened as he had been when his body had been revived and his spirit had entered it.

Kurama must have been as weak as Yusuke himself felt, but he quickly rushed to his mother's side, leaning down and whispering, "Mother?" There was a strained, fearful note in his voice.

Yusuke slowly pushed himself up, wincing, but focused his attention on Kurama and the yokai's mother. If she died now, the wish would have been for nothing. He and Kurama would have given up half of their own life forces...for nothing.

She opened her eyes and she smiled up at Kurama, her eyes soft. She reached out to touch his face and spoke softly, calling him by his human name.

The tension seeped out of Yusuke, leaving him feeling drained and almost weak. He caught Kurama's eye and nodded to the yokai, then turned to walk towards the door. His strength had returned to him, at least mostly. He still felt a little drained, but it wasn't anything like as strong as it had been, so he was able to walk towards the door under his own power.

Kuwabara was waiting for him just outside the door, leaning against the wall. His eyes shifted over Yusuke, then looked towards the door. "Is she recovered?"

Yusuke shrugged. "The book did something. But the doctors will need to confirm if she's recovered or not." He waited for a second or two and then asked, "Do you want to talk to me?"

Kuwabara nodded, though he was still looking at the hospital room with obvious suspicion. He finally tore his eyes away and focused on Yusuke. "We should go somewhere more private." He paused, as if waiting for something, but when Yusuke didn't say anything, he just nodded and began walking out of the hospital.

Breathing in slowly, Yusuke followed Kuwabara from the hospital. He didn't really know where the other man planned for them to go, if he wanted them to have privacy, but he'd already promised to submit to what Kuwabara decided to do. He could fight against it...he could resist it. But he'd seen the worry and fear, for him, that Kuwabara felt. So even though listening to someone else and letting them have any kind of control over him was unusual, he found himself responding to the other man's worry and concern. So he followed behind Kuwabara without speaking or asking any questions.

They ended up outside an apartment building that Yusuke assumed the other man lived in. That assumption was proved to be true when Kuwabara took out a key and unlocked the door, then waved Yusuke in after him. Once they were both inside the building, with the door shut behind them, he led Yusuke up a set of stairs and to a door on the second floor.

Yusuke didn't say anything. He just stood there, waiting, as Kuwabara unlocked the door and led the way into the apartment, closing the door behind them. He still didn't say anything, deciding to wait and see what Kuwabara had to say before he spoke up.

"My parents aren't here," Kuwabara said. "We have some time to talk. Alone." He made eye contact with Yusuke and spoke in a low voice. "I don't know how you came back, but I know you were dead. Everyone mourned you. Your body was cold. I don't know how you came back to life, though I guess it has something to do with that weird girl I saw talking to you. But you died once already. And if you're not careful, you're going to die again."

Yusuke listened without giving in to his first instinct, which was to argue and protest. He tried to listen to the words Kuwabara wasn't saying. He tried to avoid losing his temper, like he might have done in the past. And when Kuwabara stopped speaking, he asked quietly, "Why do you suddenly care about that now?" The memory of the other man's reactions to his death pricked at him. Kuwabara had gone to pay his respects; had seemed really bothered by him dying. But was it just because he thought he might end up losing the person he'd decided was his rival? Or was there another reason?

"You can't die, Yusuke," Kuwabara whispered. "Not again. You don't seem to care about keeping yourself alive. About keeping yourself safe." As he spoke the words, he reached out with one hand and closed his fingers around Yusuke's wrist. "I'm not going to let you get yourself killed again."

He thought about fighting. He thought he probably should fight. But Kuwabara wasn't trying to fight with him, or attack him. He wasn't even losing his temper. He was explaining his worry...his concern...in a calm, rational manner. And Yusuke found himself responding to those words. He found himself relaxing...almost submitting. He looked down at Kuwabara's hand on his wrist and found himself waiting to see what the other man was going to do next.

Kuwabara waited, as if he was expecting Yusuke to protest or argue. When Yusuke didn't say or do anything, he used the grip on his wrist to draw him into the main room, walking over and taking a seat on the sofa. Then, he drew Yusuke over to stand in front of him and unfastened his trousers, pushing them down towards his ankles.

Yusuke took in a deep breath and waited, holding his hands up and out of the way. He knew that, prior to dying and being brought back to life, he would have fought against anyone who tried to punish him in this way. He would have fought against anyone who'd tried to control him in this way.

But things were different now. He felt different now.

Once his trousers were pulled down, Kuwabara took hold of his wrist again and guided him forward, positioning him across his lap. "I know we haven't been friends, Yusuke. We've been rivals until this time. But I don't want you to die." He placed a hand on Yusuke's back, rubbing gently, then moved his hand a bit lower, pulling the boxers down.

Breathing in deeply, Yusuke reached down and let his fingers close around Kuwabara's ankle. He didn't say anything, because really...what could he say to that? He didn't have any excuses, or reasons for his actions. There was nothing he could say in his defence.

All he could do was lay there and wait for whatever Kuwabara chose to do.

Once his underwear was clear of his bottom, Yusuke felt Kuwabara's hand lift from his body. He tensed up, unable to help it, but even that couldn't prepare him for the stinging, hard swat that landed at the crest of his right buttock.

It hurt far more than Yusuke had expected it to. It was nothing compared to being in a fight...to being punched and kicked...but it was still more painful than he'd anticipated. And he couldn't help but let out a tiny yelp at the swat, his fingers gripping a bit tighter on Kuwabara's ankle.

The second smack, to the opposite buttock, was just as strong as the first, and Yusuke let out a tiny gasp. He shifted slightly as Kuwabara continued to swat, covering every inch of his bottom down to mid-thigh.

And then, when he started over from the top, he was covering skin that had already received attention.

Yusuke let out a quiet cry. He hadn't planned to react to the spanking. He'd thought that he would only let Kuwabara do whatever he wanted...and then it would be finished. But Kuwabara had caught him off guard when he'd revealed his fears that Yusuke might die again. And he found himself responding to the punishment...to the correction...by submitting.

By this point, Kuwabara had started a third circuit of smacks and was going a fraction harder and faster. And it was when he was partway through that circuit that he began to speak again. "We've been fighting each other since I can remember. But that doesn't mean I wanted you to die. I never wanted you to die, Yusuke. And it hurt way more than I thought it would when you did." A hoarse note crept into his voice.

Yusuke shifted slightly, feeling tears blurring his vision. It wasn't the pain of the spanking that was drawing the tears from him, though. Kuwabara was making it clear that he wanted Yusuke to stay alive, in spite of the rivalry that had been going on between them for so long. And he found himself responding...his body submitting almost automatically to the spanking. He gripped Kuwabara's ankle a bit tighter and relaxed more fully over the other man's lap, more tears beginning to flow out of his eyes. He slumped over Kuwabara's lap, his body submitting to the correction.

Kuwabara finished with a final flurry of smacks to Yusuke's sit spots and thighs and then stopped. He rubbed Yusuke's back with the hand he'd just been using to spank Yusuke with, and spoke in a low voice. "I don't want you to risk your own life again, Yusuke. If you do, I won't hesitate to spank you again."

"I understand." Yusuke allowed himself to relax into the touch for a few moments, then he slowly pushed himself up and wiped at his eyes. Raising his head to look into Kuwabara's eyes, he said quietly, "Thank you. For caring. Caring enough to do something about this."

Kuwabara nodded and reached out, placing a hand on his shoulder and squeezing gently. "I'm glad you're still here."

"I didn't think you would be." Yusuke hesitated, reaching back to rub his bottom, and gave Kuwabara a tiny smile. "I never expected you to spank me, though. What made you think of it?" he couldn't help but ask.

"I didn't have any other ideas. You were about to rush headlong into a dangerous situation and...all I could think of was being a child about to run into the road and my dad giving me a smack." Kuwabara looked slightly awkward as he admitted, "When I grabbed you, that was the only idea in my head. I figured you'd punch me for it...that I'd end up with a broken nose or a black eye. Wasn't expecting you to actually let me discipline you." He made eye contact with Yusuke. "I don't think this is gonna be a one-time thing. I think it'll be necessary to punish you again, to spank you again, in the future. Because I know you, and I know what you're likely to do."

Yusuke thought that promise should annoy him, or bother him much more than it actually did. Instead, he found himself nodding. "I understand." His bottom was still stinging. It wasn't unbearable, but the pain would last for the rest of the day...and probably well into the next, too. He figured the pain was something to learn from as much as the punishment had been. He took a deep breath and then smiled at Kuwabara. "I was going to get some rice. Would you like to join me?"

Kuwabara looked into his eyes, as if searching for something, and then finally nodded, smiling as well. "Yes. I would like that," he agreed.

The End