Picking A Side

Summary: Set during Captain America: Winter Soldier. What if Steve had one more person on his side?
Warning(s): Spanking; some violence; one character having a tracking device cut out; Bondage; M/m; sexual situations; First time; Spoilers for Captain America: Winter Soldier; AU
Authors: Cat and Hope1iz

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Steve waited until the elevator was filled with the agents. He'd known almost immediately that there was going to be a fight but had waited...biding his time until he knew just how many he was facing. They clearly thought that a small, enclosed space would limit him.

But he was already planning his movements.

"Before we begin," Steve addressed the agents as a whole, "does anyone want to get off?"

There was no verbal response. But almost immediately, he was deflecting an attack from one of the agents and blocking a blow from another.

To say Brock was surprised by Steve's question as the elevator slowly took them to their destination would have been an exaggeration. He could tell the other man was suspicious the moment he got onto the cart and the rest of the strike team had followed him on (the first half already being there). No. He wasn't surprised at the question, but he was still hit by a sudden, overwhelming panic. This was it. This was what his small, youthful mistake had eventually led to. Him attacking Captain America with a bunch of zealots who likely didn't fully understand the cause they were fighting for any more than he originally had.

When he'd first been recruited to HYDRA, he'd been rebelling against his parents, authority, and everything he'd been taught. Not because any of it was all that bad; but because he wanted to be his own person and make his own decisions. Fighting for a 'new world order' that rewarded those that worked hard instead of just taking from them to give to those who didn't seemed like a good way to rebel (and he wasn't entirely heartless; he knew some couldn't work hard... but there had to be a better way to help them without helping the lazy ass-holes who knew how to work the system and HYDRA was saying they could do that). Although his method of rebelling ended up not amounting to much; he was told to keep their real identity a secret and their big 'job' for him was to go into the military.

His parents had ended up being proud of him. Something he was glad of now; they'd died in a car accident shortly after he'd enlisted. They hadn't died ashamed of him and he'd done his best to behave in a way that they wouldn't be ashamed of, even if he knew they'd never have understood if they learned of HYDRA. Of course, he knew HYDRA worked with the Nazis during the war. ​Who didn't? But as the other student who recruited him pointed out, the Japanese and Italians allied with the Nazis too and no one looked at them like they were monsters or were Nazis themselves. The only reason HYDRA got lumped into that group was because Captain America had been fighting HYDRA specifically and everyone bought into the propaganda pushed by Peggy Carter and Howard Stark after his plane went down. That's what he told himself whenever he had moments of self-doubt.

And then he'd worked his way up the ranks and discovered that no, they weren't Nazis; they were worse than Nazis. They weren't any of the typical 'ists' or 'ics'... they didn't have to be. Their entire philosophy was humanity needed to be culled, all humanity; only those loyal to HYDRA deserved to live (and of those, only those strong enough and smart enough to outwit or out-fight other HYDRA members.) He'd joined SHIELD on their orders, which had ended up working in his favor. Because he was on one of the elite Strike teams, he wasn't asked to do any of the 'off-the-books' jobs that solo agents aligned with HYDRA had to do (he knew of those jobs. That was guilt inducing enough.) His job was to keep his nose clean and be ready for when HYDRA made its move.

He'd felt progressively more guilty and wished more fervently he'd never heard of HYDRA, let alone joined, the further he rose in rank and learned of what they were doing and had planned. But one of the first things he'd learned was you never left HYDRA. His parents were dead, but that didn't mean they wouldn't go after his next-door neighbors' five-year old, or the professor that helped him pass chemistry, or the cute barista that had winked at him that morning. The only way out of HYDRA was death and... he was a coward. He was afraid to die.

So here he was. HYDRA was making its final play; and his role was to kill Captain America.

He had nothing against Steve. In fact, he admired the other man to a point bordering on hero worship. He didn't want to kill him. He didn't want to see shame and disappointment, directed at himself, in Steve's eyes. He didn't want to go through with this.

And so, he didn't. His cohorts hadn't been expecting it. Between Steve's superior fighting skills and his own defection, all the team sent to take Captain America out were knocked-out themselves. Only Brock and Steve remained standing. Brock looked around himself, wide-eyed, as it fully registered what he'd just done and what it meant. "I'm a walking dead man..." he whispered, before finally looking into Steve's face.

Steve looked around at the unconscious men that covered the floor of the elevator. And then he looked at Brock. And he felt a stab of pained betrayal. Because these others? They weren't people he'd had any personal connection with. He didn't know their names; worked with them when necessary but hadn't really formed any attachments.

Brock was different. Steve liked the man. Had done since the first time they'd met. They'd worked well together and if he was entirely honest with himself, Steve would never have expected Brock to have been a HYDRA agent.

There wasn't much of a reason to trust Brock right now, except that the other man had fought against his cohorts alongside Steve. And he was right. HYDRA didn't forgive deflection. Wouldn't stand for someone changing sides.

"Damn it," Steve muttered, which was about all the cursing he'd allow himself. He moved quickly to Brock's side, grasping the other man's shoulder. "We can't wait to reach the bottom. You need to grab onto me." He broke the glass without waiting for a response. Grabbed Brock, threw the other man over his shoulder and leaped out of the window, grip tight and secure so that he'd be the only one absorbing the shockwave when they hit the ground.

Brock barely had time to register the words before Steve was acting. He'd frantically gripped onto the larger man, fingers digging in as he felt them both falling. And then they were landing. He swallowed several times; both to tamp down the fear the free-fall had caused, as well as the nausea from nerves said fall had caused. He didn't try to get out of Steve's grip. Not immediately. He didn't want the other man to think he'd changed his mind and was now fighting him.

Steve didn't let go of Brock, even though he did set the other man down on the ground. He moved quickly, heading into the crowd of people so that they wouldn't be immediately visible. "We can't go to our apartments. That's the first place anyone would look." He took out his cell phone and sent off a quick message, asking for help from the only one he felt able to trust.

"I can't go anywhere I used to go... if they see me there once, they'll know I'll be able to see them and they'll... they'll hurt innocent people to draw me out..." Brock admitted.

Steve nodded. "I don't need to get anything from my apartment. I guess you don't need to either?" He glanced at the display on his phone, seeing the message that had been sent back. Then, following the instructions on the screen, he dropped the phone underfoot and ground it beneath his heel. "Do you have a cell?"

"No... I... I have a safe box... in another city. I don't think they know about it..." He felt like it was another person speaking, moving his body as he removed his phone and stomped on it. Continuing to talk as he said, "There's a tracker embedded just under the skin of my hip. You'll want to leave me; they'll find me soon enough. I can block the signal, but I don't have any of the lined material that will do that currently with me. So, I'm unsafe until I can get some."

"I'm not leaving you," Steve stated. He was still holding onto Brock. Now, he wrapped his arm around the other man's waist. Pulled Brock almost roughly against his side as he headed through the city, following the instructions he'd been given, heading towards a car rental place.

Brock didn't argue further; kept his head down and pressed against Steve's shoulder, though his eyes were constantly watching to warn Steve if they were found. He wasn't sure of Steve's reasons for holding him close like he was doing, but to outside observers, it would appear as if they were lovers and Steve was possessively affectionate. He could work with that to try and keep under the radar. "Who did you contact for help?" he asked nervously.

"Natasha," Steve answered. "One of the only people I'm pretty certain hasn't been taken by HYDRA." Try as he might, he couldn't help but sound pained at the fact that he'd been so deceived by Brock. He didn't really know why that had hurt him so much.

"They didn't dare try and recruit her after she defected to SHIELD. They considered themselves lucky they hadn't attempted to recruit her before she defected, as she would have told Coulson, who would have told Fury..." Brock divulged. He'd heard the pained betrayal in Steve's voice and felt even guiltier. The least he could do was give as much information as possible to the other man. He owed him.

Steve just nodded in acknowledgement of the words but didn't speak. He didn't let go of Brock, either, even as he picked up the car that had been paid for under a different name. He settled both him and Brock inside the vehicle and then began driving to the coordinates Natasha had sent him.

Brock, more and more nervous that the tracker would be followed and that he'd be the reason Captain America was caught, took the opportunity of being in the car and not having to walk and watch where he was going to remove a tiny pocket knife from his pocket. He removed his shirt, knowing he was going to need to use it as a bandage, then twisted around so he was almost on his stomach and pushed his pants and underwear down just enough to expose the area of skin the tracker was buried. It wasn't easy- they'd attempted to put it in a place he couldn't see or easily reach and if he slipped, he could do serious damage- but he'd rather cripple himself at this point than cause Steve any more problems. Gritting his teeth and hoping it wasn't too deeply buried, he cut himself open and began to probe for the tracker. Only his ragged breathing and occasional quick gasp gave away how much it hurt.

As soon as he saw what Brock was doing, Steve pulled the car over and parked it on the side of the road. He reached out and took the knife from Brock's hand, wrapping his other arm around the other man's waist to hold him steady. Quickly tearing the shirt into strips, he pressed it against the blood seeping out and carefully sought out the tracker, removing it and then quickly using the shirt to press against the wound.

Shivering slightly and swallowing hard several times against the second bout of nausea that day, Brock took the tracker and crushed it before throwing it out the window and then holding his hand over the shirt so Steve could drive again. He didn't say anything. Steve hadn't asked a question and it felt like anything he might say would just look like an excuse. There were no excuses.

"You could have waited," Steve said quietly, even as he resumed driving. "You could have done yourself a lot more damage. I was going to wait until we could remove it properly. Without risking you crippled."

"Waiting would have led them to the safe-house..." Brock's voice was shaky; the only sign that he was in pain. "I've ruined my own life. I won't ruin anyone else's. Not more than I already have." His voice was thick with guilt.

"When we meet Natasha, I'm sure she has contacts with medical training," Steve said. "That cut can be checked and treated. In case you went deeper." His own voice was heavy with concern and worry. It was obvious in his face, as he was looking towards Brock almost as much as he was checking the road.

"Yes, Cap..." Brock agreed. Now that the danger of being tracked was gone, he knew it'd be better if he wasn't wounded and slowing them down. If Steve continued to insist, he stay with him, anyway.

Steve didn't speak again as he continued to drive, reaching the coordinates Natasha had sent him. The safehouse was little more than a farm hut and probably one of the last places HYDRA would think to check.

When he parked outside, Natasha quickly headed to the car. She was clearly on guard, gun in her hand.

Steve got out of the driver's side and walked round to open Brock's door, reaching in to help him out.

Natasha looked at Brock and then at Steve. "The tracker's out?" Her voice was carefully neutral.

Steve nodded. "Unless there's another one we don't know about. Is there someone you can trust who can take a look at him?" His voice was still obviously worried...still obviously concerned.

"I made contact with someone as soon as you told me you were bringing him along." Natasha glanced at Brock, still clearly on her guard, and motioned towards the farmhouse. "This way."

Brock limped beside Steve, leaning on the larger man more than he would have liked. He kept a tight grip on his pants to keep them from sliding off. He couldn't pull them up completely until the wound was dressed. Even if he wasn't showing anything more than the upper portion of his buttocks, he still felt exposed and didn't want to show more.

Natasha led the way into the main room, not that there were many rooms to choose from, where a doctor was waiting.

Steve immediately guided Brock towards the doctor, so that the other man could be checked over and treated. He still stuck close, though, making it clear just how worried he was about Brock.

Brock could tell Steve was worried and it helped him relax. He didn't understand how the other man wasn't furious, but the fact he worried about Brock at least meant that Brock was safe with him. As soon as the doctor had finished stitching and bandaging, he was pulling his clothing back into place, ignoring the ache doing so caused. He held still for a shot of antibiotics but ignored the offered bottle of pain medication. He also ignored the doctor's irritated frown at being ignored, not noticing the doctor slipping the pain medication and another bottle of antibiotics into Steve's hand as he finished packing up his stuff and left. He was too busy watching Natasha and waiting for the proverbial other shoe to fall.

Natasha leaned lightly against the wall, having been silent throughout the treatment and the doctor leaving. Once the three of them were alone, she spoke, shifting so that she could see both Steve and Brock. "So. We're supposed to believe you switched sides?" Her voice was calm and casual; but then, she didn't have the same history with Brock that Steve did. She just wanted to see how Brock would respond to her questions.

"Believe whatever keeps you and Rogers safest. I know I was on the wrong side... waited until it was too late to act on it..." Brock's voice was rough and a bit lost. He didn't know what he was going to do. He'd finally made his stand; picked the side he could live with. But it was far from over and he knew making the right decision in the elevator didn't undo years of bad decisions.

Steve glanced at Natasha. "Do you mind giving us a bit of privacy?"

"I should do another perimeter sweep anyway." Natasha put a burner phone on the side. "My number's programmed in there. If you need to call me."

"Thank you," Steve replied.

Natasha nodded and slipped out of the farmhouse.

Steve sighed quietly and turned to Brock, looking directly at him. "I believe you've switched sides, but I've got to be honest, Brock. I... I feel betrayed. Hurt. Probably more than I should be feeling, considering it's not as if you ever owed me anything."

Brock watched Natasha leave, then turned to face Steve, expecting the beatdown he knew he deserved. Instead, he got to hear how he hurt the man he looked up to and respected. He winced, fighting sudden tears from the high emotion. "I... I can't change anything. I'm sorry isn't nearly enough..." He swallowed and licked his lip before continuing, in a shaky voice, "I don't know what to do. I haven't believed in their cause for... it feels like forever. I just didn't know how to get out and was too much of a coward to try." He looked into Steve's eyes. "I wish I hadn't betrayed you... I betrayed myself first."

Steve reached out, gently touching Brock's shoulder; lightly squeezing it. "I'm not planning on letting you leave me, Brock." He hesitated, but HYDRA's move had removed that hesitation. They were alone now, apart from the few allies they could find. "I know I haven't said anything before...this might not be the best time, but I can't hold back now...I love you, Brock." His voice, his face, was open, honest, and sincere. He was giving Brock the power to hurt him deeply, worse than learning the other man was HYDRA. But like he'd said. He wasn't going to hide anymore.

Brock's mouth fell slightly open at the admission, eyes widening in surprise. He'd never had a clue Steve felt that way about him. He felt his blood warm at the knowledge. He'd never allowed himself to think it possible, so had convinced himself his own feelings of admiration and respect were purely that and nothing more. At hearing Steve's declaration, something shifted in his heart. For the first time since realizing he'd made a mistake joining HYDRA, he felt hope. Without giving himself a chance to second guess himself, he shifted into Steve's personal space and pressed his lips to the other man's in a desperate kiss.

Steve immediately wrapped his own arms around Brock, hugging tightly as he returned the kiss. He was careful not to press on the wound, but his embrace was tight, nearly desperate on his own part.

Feeling the strength of the arms holding him eased what little fear Brock had at giving in to his need. He brought his own arms up to wrap around Steve, more clinging than confining. The tighter Steve held him, the safer and more certain of his decision he felt.

Steve hugged Brock tightly, hand rubbing down the other man's back. Even when he pulled back from the kiss, he still held on, nuzzling against Brock's neck.

Brock had avoided any sounds that would betray his fear or pain... but when Steve nuzzled his neck while still holding tight, he couldn't stop the needy whimper. He shifted to test Steve's grip on him.

Steve tightened his hold on Brock, pulling the other man closer. He pressed a kiss to Brock's neck and whispered, "I love you. And I'm not letting you go any time soon."

Brock chuffed softly at that, relaxing onto Steve. He was happy at the words, content and surprised at the slight arousal he felt at finding himself confined in Steve's arms. He pressed his face into Steve's shoulder, leaving his neck open and vulnerable. "Love you too, Cap. I know it doesn't change anything but... I am sorry..." he whispered.

Steve kissed his neck and murmured softly, "We can deal with that. I'll punish you and then we can move past it."

"How? What can possibly make me pay enough for my betrayal?" Brock whispered

"Spanking," Steve answered. "I know it's unconventional and old-fashioned, but I come from a time when it was used more often. And it was effective."

"You would accept that as enough? I know it would be difficult to punish me another way, but would that really be enough?" Brock asked.

"It would be enough for me," Steve answered honestly. "I love you. I don't want to do anything that would cause you permanent or even lasting harm. And spanking is a personal punishment. Because this was very personal."

Brock swallowed before nodding slightly. "Can't say the idea of being spanked appeals to me, so that means it probably works as a punishment..." Brock admitted.

Steve nodded and led Brock over to the couch. Taking a seat, he gently guided the other man over his lap before baring him.

Brock swallowed yet again at being made bare, unable to keep from clenching his cheeks in awareness of what was about to happen. Only his trust in Steve enabled him to stay in position and not try to escape.

Steve rubbed Brock's back gently for a moment or two before he wrapped his arm around the other man's waist to secure him, careful not to aggravate the wound. He then delivered the first firm smack that he then repeated.

Brock had debated being stoic and quiet during the punishment, but he'd finally decided that what he needed to be was honest. He was being punished for betraying Steve by lying about who he really worked for (even if he defected). So, he wouldn't hide his reactions. The smacks stung, so he let out tiny hisses of discomfort. And he allowed himself to squirm, trusting Steve to keep him safely in place.

Steve kept a tight grip on Brock, making sure he didn't risk falling or pulling at his wound. He continued to swat firmly, going down to Brock's thighs before starting over from the top.

Brock was surprised at how quickly his emotions plummeted in this position. He'd been feeling guilty, but now he also felt lost and hopeless... or... no. It wasn't the spanking causing those feelings. The spanking was just bringing those feelings that he already had to the top, where he couldn't hide them or hide from them any longer. Tears formed in his eyes, dripping down his face, as he confronted what his life had become. Only Steve's tight grip on him gave him hope. He let out a trembling whine.

Steve started a third circuit of swats, going a fraction harder and faster. As he reached the halfway point, he began to speak. "When I realized you were on HYDRA's side, when I saw you in the elevator, it hurt so much. I might have been in the position of having to take you out. You'd been deceiving me from the start, since we first started doing missions together."

"I had..." Brock's voice was rough with tears and guilt. He didn't bother denying the truth or try to make excuses.

Steve rubbed his other hand over Brock's back, even as he continued to smack. "I'm glad, I'm relieved, I'm proud that you did the right thing in the end. I know how difficult it was to take that step away from HYDRA. To switch to my side. I might have been disappointed, angry and hurt at first, but I'm not anymore," he promised.

"I... I couldn't... they wanted... but I couldn't..." Brock slumped before beginning to cry loudly.  "...All I could think was you are the best man I know, and I wish I'd never joined them and if I went through with it... What little good was left in me would die with you. I respect and... and love you so much and I almost ruined it...."

"You didn't," Steve soothed. "You did the right thing in the end. You made the right choice." He was still rubbing Brock's back as he said, a slightly sterner note slipping into his voice, "And you don't decide to hurt yourself when it's not necessary."

Brock shivered, asking in a confused voice, still thick with tears, "I didn't... did I?"

"You refused the pain medication." Steve spoke in a gentle, caring tone. "It seemed like you didn't care if you were hurt or not. But we're together now and I care if you're hurt or not. So, I won't let you do things like refuse pain medication."

"I felt like I deserved to hurt..." Brock said, in a shaky voice. "But I won't refuse to take care of myself if you don't like it."

"I need you to take care of yourself," Steve said seriously. "I love you. And it hurts me to see you hurt."

"I'll try then. I owe you that much, at least... to try and avoid hurting you." Brock's crying had slowed. He didn't attempt to get up, though. He didn't know if Steve was done punishing him or not.

"Good. I need you, Brock," Steve said seriously. "I need you healthy and well. I need you with me. I always wanted that before," he admitted. "It always felt good when we were on missions together." He replaced Brock's clothing and then carefully helped the other man up and into his arms, holding on tight.

"I knew for a while that I'd made a mistake... joining HYDRA. I was always too scared to leave them. And then you were found and the only time anything felt right was when we were together. I'm still a little scared, leaving. But as-long-as I'm with you, I can be brave..." Brock hugged tightly.

"You're always going to be with me," Steve promised. "I'm never going to let you get taken from me. Not now I finally know you feel the same way."

Brock smiled at that. "I'll do everything I can to help you."

"I know." Steve kissed him gently, then retrieved the bottle of pain medication and looked expectantly at Brock.

Giving Steve a wry smile, Brock took the bottle and read the instructions before palming the recommended dose. "There any water in this place?" he asked, while handing the bottle back to Steve.

"I'm sure there probably is." Steve settled Brock on the couch, then headed through to the other room, where he found a kitchen with a sink and some plastic cups. He filled one with water and brought it through to Brock.

"Thanks, love." Brock gave Steve a flirty smile before swallowing the medication down with the entire glass of water.

Steve smiled and sat next to Brock. Having noticed the way, the other man responded to being held earlier, he wrapped his arms around Brock in a tight hug once the medication had been taken, effectively trapping him.

Brock shivered and pressed close. Laying his head on Steve's shoulder, he said gruffly, "This feels good. Safe. And... kinda turns me on..." he admitted, with a sheepish smile.

Pressing a kiss to his neck, Steve murmured, "I noticed it did when I held you tight and didn't let go earlier."

"Didn't realize being subdued was a turn on before. Or maybe it's you subduing me that is the turn on..." Brock slanted his head so Steve could get to more of his neck.

"Maybe we could try bondage," Steve suggested, letting his teeth graze lightly against the skin of Brock's throat.

Brock moaned softly, both at the nipping and at the words. "Not something I ever thought I'd hear coming out of your mouth..." He chuckled. "I want to. If you are in control of the lock and key... or the rope… or whatever. I'd be bound for you..." His voice was rough, his arousal clear.

"I'd be in control," Steve murmured. "In complete control of whatever I bind you with." He continued to gently nip at the other man's throat.

"In complete control of my movement... I'd be completely vulnerable to whatever you wanted to do..." Brock's voice was husky, breathy.

"That sounds perfect," Steve murmured, his hitched breath giving away that he was aroused.

"More than perfect..." Brock turned his head just enough to catch Steve's lips with his own. "Do you have anything to tie me with? And... do you have supplies so you can take me? I want to be taken by you..." Brock whispered.

"I have supplies." Steve kissed Brock back tenderly. "I can tie you up. And I can take you fully." He pressed a bit harder into the kiss.

"Good..." Brock groaned against Steve's mouth, opening his own for the other man to plunder.

Steve let his tongue push into Brock's mouth, kissing him deeply, before he carefully lifted the other man into his arms and carried him towards the stairs.

Brock wrapped his arms around Steve's shoulders and kissed everywhere he could reach, without making it impossible for Steve to walk.

Upstairs, Steve found one of the bedrooms and carried Brock inside. He placed the other man on the bed and then retrieved what he needed to tie Brock up with.

Brock watched Steve with half lowered eyes. "So sexy..." he murmured, watching Steve move.

Steve smiled and leaned in, to kiss Brock lingeringly, stroking the side of his face. "I love you," he murmured, before then proceeding to tie his lover up...making sure that it wouldn't be too tight, even if Brock wouldn't be able to escape until Steve freed him.

Brock kissed back greedily. As soon as he was tied, he tested the binding, smiling in contentment when he couldn't get free. "...Completely at your mercy..." he whispered.

"Exactly where I want you." Steve began to strip Brock, slowly, of his clothing, touching, caressing, and kissing every part of his body as it was revealed.

Brock groaned and shivered as Steve undressed him. He squirmed as much as he was able, which wasn't very much. He could feel himself becoming aroused... as soon as Steve removed his pants and underwear, his member sprung to attention.

Steve smiled, reaching down, and grasping Brock's member. He looked Brock over slowly and whispered, "So beautiful."

Brock quivered and let out a high-pitched whimper of need as Steve grasped him, blushing at the sound he'd just made. "Feel beautiful, the way you look at me..." he said, in a shaky voice.

Steve let his thumb stroke gently over the tip of Brock's member, leaning in to kiss his lover deeply. "You are," he whispered against Brock's lips.

Brock whimpered, his hips thrusting shallowly in response to Steve's actions, and lifted his face to press their lips closer so he could kiss Steve.

Steve kissed a bit more deeply, still fondling Brock's erection, as he whispered to the other man, "I don't want you to release until I say so."

Brock groaned, then sighed softly. "Yes, sir..." he said, against Steve's lips.

"Good," Steve murmured, moving Brock to make it easier for him to kiss, touch, caress....

Brock groaned again, trying to press closer to Steve, but unable to move closer. Unless the larger man wanted it, Brock was limited to being separated by a few frustrating inches, only being touched where Steven wanted to touch. As frustrating as it was, it also caused his arousal to increase.

Steve's own arousal was obvious by this point. Having this kind of control over Brock felt good. Really good. He moved back enough to remove his own clothes before retrieving what he needed for the next step.

Brock whined, loudly, as Steve left him, squirming and panting. "Hurry..." he begged, not ashamed to let Steve hear and see how much he was needed.

Steve returned only seconds later, placing the jar of lube on the side, and coating his finger in it liberally before he began to make slow circles over Brock's entrance.

Brock couldn't help but stiffen slightly as he felt Steve gently rubbing. As aroused as he was, as much as he wanted to be taken by Steve, he couldn't help sudden nerves. His breathing sped up fractionally and the look he gave Steve was needy desire mixed with fear. "You...  you're so big..." His whisper was gasped, and he swallowed hard. "I've never actually... I want you to take me so bad, but I don't know if..." The nerves were clear in his voice. He looked into Steve's eyes, trusting him. "You can help me take it, right? So, I can make it good for you?"

"I'll help you." Steve reached out and ran his fingers over Brock's cheek; leaned in to kiss him tenderly. "You don't have to worry or feel afraid. I'm not rushing anything. We'll take our time."

Brock relaxed at the words and the gentleness, shifting as much as he was able within the bindings. "Love you..." he whispered.

"I love you. Have done for a very long time." Steve whispered the words against Brock's lips as he continued exploring the other man's entrance with his lube-coated finger.

"I... I'm so glad I... finally did the right thing. That I can be with you..." Brock whimpered, shifting again. Steve had tied him in such a way that he was completely vulnerable, unable to move or hide from Steve's gaze or fingers. Not that he wanted to. If he could have moved, he would have opened his legs further. Steve controlled how open he was, though; and that aroused him even further.

"You did the right thing," Steve murmured. "And we're together now. I won't let you go." Watching Brock's reactions carefully, he began to gently push his finger inside.

Brock began to wriggle a little more frantically, panting with need, and groaned as Steve began to breach him. "So good..." he whined. His member was fully erect and pearls of precum pooled in the slit.

"You feel so good." Steve whispered the words in Brock's ear before asking, softly, "Are you ready to take another finger?"

Brock shivered and took a few seconds to think about it before answering, in a breathless voice, "Yes... wanna feel more of you...."

"Good," Steve murmured, kissing him, before he carefully pushed the second finger inside Brock, still watching his reactions closely and making sure he went as slow and gentle as possible.

Brock let out a low, keening sound as he felt himself stretch. "...Feels so good...belonging to you... being opened for you... being at your mercy..." He began to babble, his body quivering in the bindings.

"You're mine." Steve gently nipped at the skin of Brock's throat, even as he began to move his fingers in slow circles inside Brock. "You feel so good," he whispered. "You're being so good."

"I only want to be good for you... never wanna be bad again..." Brock swallowed, his throat moving against Steve's lips. He could feel himself stretching, opening, and relaxing around Steve's fingers. Steve was a lot larger than just two fingers, though, and he knew he was still tight.

"I know you'll be good for me." Steve whispered the words against Brock's skin. "I trust that you're on my side, with me, now." He lightly bit Brock's throat, though not enough to cause harm.

Brock groaned at the bite. "That...felt really good, Cap..." he said, in a shaky voice.

"Would you like me to do it again?" Steve asked softly.

"Uh huh... please?" Brock nodded his head very slightly, so that he wouldn't bump into Steve's face, and clenched around the older man's fingers. "...Liked it..." he admitted.

Steve gently bit again, his fingers still circling around inside Brock, his other hand holding his lover tight.

Brock groaned again. It was obvious what Steve was doing felt good to him. He clenched tight around Steve's fingers, before relaxing and becoming looser. "...Can... can take another, love..." he said, not quite a suggestion and not quite a request. He felt warm all over and his body was flushed with desire.

Steve nuzzled against Brock's neck before gently biting again and pushing a third finger slowly inside his lover, now rubbing inside with three fingers.

Brock took a slow deep breath. He could feel the stretch; there was a slight burn, but it didn't hurt. And feeling Steve's teeth, knowing there was nothing he could do to stop anything that Steve wanted to do... he was aching, but Steve had said not to come until he said and Brock somehow managed to control himself. "Feel so good..." he moaned softly.

"You feel so good. So perfect. So beautiful," Steve whispered, gently squeezing Brock's hip that hadn't been wounded. "I've wanted to be with you for so long," he admitted, his voice hitching with his own arousal.

"I'm yours... I'll never leave you again and whenever you want me... I'll be there...." Brock promised, voice earnest and eyes turning glassy from need and love.

Steve kissed Brock's lips tenderly. "Good," he whispered. "I can't lose you. I can't ever lose you." He continued preparing his lover. Finally, though, he pulled his fingers free to coat his member with the lube.

Brock took a shivering breath and whined as Steve removed his fingers. He tried to relax and not tense up, knowing that even with preparation, it might hurt. But he wanted it more than he was nervous at the idea of pain.

"I'll go slow," Steve promised, brushing tender kisses over Brock's face. "If it gets too much, tell me and I'll stop."

"Okay..." Brock's voice was small but trusting. He quivered under Steve, fingers clenching into fists since he couldn't grip onto Steve. "...I want this..." he breathed out.

"Are you sure?" Steve stroked his cheek. "We don't have to go that far right now. We can wait. There's no need to rush," he promised.

"I'm positive!" Brock said, as emphatically as he could, given he was struggling not to come all over Steve. "I... I know it might hurt, probably will at first... but I want it."

Kissing Brock tenderly, Steve held him tightly as he carefully began to push into his lover, going as slow and gentle as possible.

Brock whimpered as Steve pushed in. It didn't hurt... but it wasn't comfortable, and he was too nervous for it to truly feel good. Still... it was the man he loved taking him, pushing into him... and the idea of it... the knowledge that he truly belonged to Steve now... helped make the discomfort worth it. Of course, the deeper Steve pushed, the further Brock stretched, and it began to sting and ache in a way he'd never felt before. He took a quick breath, panting slightly.

Steve stopped, his entire focus on Brock. Clearly worried, he reached out and stroked his fingers over the other man's face. "You don't have to force anything to make me happy, Brock," he said softly. "Just being with you, knowing you love me and that I don't need to hide how I feel about you, is enough."

"I know..." Brock said, his voice higher and more strained than he would have liked while trying to reassure Steve. "I want this. I just... need to go slow. It... it prolly won't feel all awesome like... well I've never actually read or watched gay porn, so I'm not sure how they make it seem, but if it's the same exaggerated greatness tended to be applied to hetero sex, I wasn't expecting to see stars my first-time anyway..." He was smiling and chuckled breathlessly to take the possible sting out of his words. "This is... this is about being able to know in my head and heart that we're really together and I didn't imagine it. And about making you feel good after I made you feel so awful. And about my body learning you and adjusting to you so that, eventually, it accepts you as easily as it accepts those damn probes they use during the yearly physical exam. Eventually, you sliding into me will be easy... and then? Then maybe I'll see stars. I need this, Steve... and I trust you to go slow enough not to injure me." Brock's words were as earnest and heartfelt as he could make them sound when he was still fully aroused (despite the discomfort), impaled on Steve and panting like he was in labor. (He didn't have a clue how Steve could find him sexy right now.)

"I'll go slow," Steve promised. "But I don't need to be inside you to feel good. I understand if you need this...but I just need you," he said honestly. "Even if we never went all the way, I'd be happy we were together."

Brock's smile was soft, accepting, and full of belief. "I know. And I would be happy with whatever we did or didn't do as-long-as I was with you. But this will help me. I don't know how to explain it, but it will...."

Steve nodded and kissed him gently. "If you need me to stop, if you need time to adjust, all you need to do is say." He resumed slowly pushing inside Brock, still carefully watching his lover's reactions.

Brock was able to breathe through Steve pushing fully into him; his lover moved slowly enough he was able to adjust without stopping. Still, it wasn't overly comfortable. Leaning up as far as the restraints would allow, he kissed Steve. "You can move, Love..." he finally whispered.

Returning the kiss, Steve caressed the side of Brock's face. "I love you," he whispered against the other man's lips, before beginning to move inside him.

"Love you..." Brock replied, shifting enough so that Steve could easily move in him and go as deep as possible. It still wasn't comfortable, the friction more irritating than pleasurable, but it didn't hurt, and the sting was lessening the longer Steve moved. Especially a few times when the larger man hit a spot in him that felt very good, it was pleasurable enough to overcome the discomfort. "There..." he gasped out, after the third time he felt it, and he finally realized what was happening.

"Good?" Steve murmured, though the question was more of a rhetorical one as he gripped Brock a little more firmly and continued moving, making sure he hit that one specific spot. "Any time," he whispered. "Any time you're ready, you can let go."

Brock's eyes widened at the permission. Seconds later, he was spasming, his orgasm tearing through him and leaving him a shaky, quivering mess under Steve. When it was over, he clenched around Steve's member, turning glazed eyes onto his lover. "Yeah...I'd say it was good..." He grinned crookedly and shifted, so Steve could keep moving and hopefully find his own release.

Steve leaned in and gently kissed Brock's neck, grazing the skin with his teeth as his own release came over him. His hand wrapped around Brock's hip, pulling the other man closer to him.

Brock could feel Steve releasing inside him and hummed appreciatively. He slanted his head, so his neck was more exposed. "Love you..." he said once again, once his breathing evened out.

"I love you." Steve nuzzled into his neck. "I think I have done since that very first mission we worked on together," he admitted.

Brock smiled at that. "And now we can be together forever..." he whispered. Shifting slightly, he winced faintly. "As much as I wanted this and enjoyed it, though, I think I need to be untied. My arms are getting stiff..." he admitted sheepishly. He didn't say anything about feeling sore inside. It didn't hurt, so he could deal with a little soreness.

"I'll take care of you inside, too," Steve said, fairly sure that his lover would be sore. He carefully withdrew from Brock, then untied his lover and moved to collect some ointment from his supplies.

"After you help take care of me, maybe we can take a shower and then get some sleep? I get the idea that the next few days, if not weeks, are going to be... rough." Brock sighed softly, thinking about the mess that HYDRA had unleashed on the world.

Steve nodded. "We'll want to get food, too. Maybe before sleep. I don't want you waking up hungry." He began to carefully treat inside Brock, using the ointment to soothe the soreness.

Brock held still while Steve treated him. It was slightly different, having Steve touching him to treat him instead of to arouse him, but it felt good to him, knowing that Steve wanted to take care of him. He grinned at the other man from over his shoulder. "You've always worried about your men waking up hungry. All our missions, you made sure we ate before bedding down too..." he noted.

"In case of an emergency," Steve commented. "Being hungry's liable to slow people down as much as tiredness will. And now, I have even more of a reason to keep you safe."

"Well...You won't get any argument from me. You're still my Captain, my leader. Even if I no longer have a job in SHIELD." Brock's smile was a bit sad at the last statement.

"I'm not even really sure how much of SHIELD is still SHIELD," Steve said. "But you'll always have a place with me. No matter what happens."

"No matter what, I'll follow you..." Brock promised. He'd made his decision and he didn't regret it at all. He'd do his best to make sure Steve didn't regret it either.

Steve finished treating inside Brock and then leaned in to kiss him tenderly. "Your place is with me," he promised, before lifting the other man into his arms so that he could carry him through to the bathroom.

Brock chuckled, wrapping his arms around Steve. "I can walk..." he protested half-heartedly.

"I'm taking full advantage of being able to touch and hold you," Steve said. "Now that we finally belong to each other." Inside the bathroom, he turned the shower on, making sure it was at a comfortable temperature before they entered.

"Can't argue with that..." Brock grinned, laughing happily. He continued to hold on, so that Steve could take care of the water, letting his mate do all the hard work.

Steve was perfectly happy and content to take over washing and cleaning them both off. He took every opportunity to kiss Brock, or just to touch him; not in a demanding or even sexual way, but almost like he still couldn't quite believe they were finally at this point.

Brock was content to let Steve take over completely. Now that he was safe; now that he'd made his final decision about whose side he was on; now that he was with the man he loved, he was ready to take each moment as it came without trying to speed things up. There would be enough time to worry about what was coming. Right now, he just wanted to be in the moment.

After making sure they were both washed and dried, Steve carried Brock back into the bedroom, noticing that two sets of clean clothes had been put on the bed; along with a note from Natasha, telling them she was cooking and that food would be ready in about ten minutes.

"How did she know?" Brock asked curiously. Even if they did have to share a bath in this small house, that didn't mean they'd be sharing a bed. But the clothes being together indicated she believed they would.

"Maybe I wasn't quite as good at hiding how I felt from other people as I thought," Steve said. "Especially when I brought you here and... well. She probably noticed how I was reacting to you being hurt." He carefully set Brock down so they could dress.

Brock dressed quickly, if carefully. "Well, she always did have a reputation for being observant. It was probably obvious how I felt as well, given I turned myself over to you rather than complete the mission I'd been given."

"I can only see it as being a good thing, since it means we won't have to worry about hiding our relationship." As soon as they were both dressed, Steve wrapped his arm around Brock, drawing him into a deep kiss.

Brock returned the kiss eagerly. "Wouldn't even try to hide it..." he murmured against Steve's lips.

"Good." Steve held him for a few moments, close and tight the way he knew his lover liked, and then took Brock's hand to lead him from the room and down the stairs.

Brock held back just as tight, then let himself be led.

By the time they got downstairs, Natasha was already plating up food for the three of them. "Figured you might be hungry. It's been a long day," she commented.

"I can't argue there." Steve led Brock to the table so they could sit down.

Brock sat down where Steve indicated he should and gave Natasha a hesitant smile. "Thank you. It has been..." he said, trying to gauge her mood and how she might feel about him.

"You're on Steve's side?" Natasha asked, as she too sat down. She was watching Brock, looking at his body language as much as listening to his words and paying attention to his tone of voice.

"I am. From now on, I only obey his orders. That way, I can be certain I'm doing the right thing..." Brock said quietly.

"We're involved, too." Steve wanted to make that clear; to get it out in the open. Even though he was fairly certain she'd already guessed.

Natasha nodded. "I can see that. It's probably a good thing. At least it means mutual trust is easier. Less likely to betray someone you're in love with."

"That's not necessarily true, but I figure I will do my best not to betray him... and if we're together, it will be more difficult at least..." Brock let his cynical side show, even though it wouldn't help put him in a good light.

"I trust you." Steve's voice was low, calm, sincere. "I don't believe you'll betray me. I believe you're fully on my side."

Natasha gave a tiny smile. "And really, Captain America's belief in you is all you truly need."

Brock's grin grew. "It really is all I need..." he admitted. "He's got enough confidence for both of us."

Steve took Brock's hand and squeezed it gently. He knew that there was still a lot they were going to need to deal with. That HYDRA had made their move and needed to be handled. But for right now, with the man he loved, he could be happy. Contented. At least for a short time.

The End