Overcoming Failure

Summary:  Boromir gets a chance to undo his mistakes. Written for the SpankVent challenge on Spanking_World over at LiveJournal
Warning(s):  Spanking; canon violence mentioned; some descriptions of wounds being treated; references to cannibalism. Spoilers for LoTR: The Fellowship of the Ring. AU

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"Run! I'll hold them off!" Boromir screamed at Frodo and Sam, watching as Merry and Pippin were carried away from them while the rest of the orcs swarmed toward him and the two remaining hobbits. He regretted deeply now that he had scared them into running this far out to try and get away from him and his insanity in thinking he could control the ring for good. So many others had felt the same and fell... he'd let the evil of the ring get into his head and control him and he was deeply ashamed, but there was no time for that now. He had to protect the hobbits. To that end, he threw himself into battle, holding off all the ones that would have pursued Frodo; at least until he was shot through with several arrows and a spear. He was going to die; there was no way to avoid it, given that no one knew where he was except the hobbits and if they had listened and run for their lives, by the time they led anyone else to his precise location, he would have bled out. He only wished he could die knowing that he'd been successful, and they'd got away.

The orcs had converged on one spot, probably where the two hobbits had headed, and Aragorn was quick to pursue, reaching the scene of battle to realize two things. The first that there was no sign of Frodo or Sam. The second that Boromir was heavily wounded, perhaps even fatally.

Killing the last remaining orc, Aragorn reached Boromir's side quickly, helping him to sit down against the base of the closest tree as he began to carefully examine the wounds.

"Did... did the little ones, escape? Did they get away?" Boromir asked, in an almost heartbroken fear. If they had died, their deaths were on him. Had he not attempted to get the ring, they would have been closer to where Aragorn, Legolas and Gimli were.

Aragorn hesitated. "There are no signs that the orcs have taken any prisoners with them." He used his dagger to begin to carefully cut Boromir's tunic, allowing him to see how deep the arrows had gone and how much blood Boromir had lost.

"Frodo and Sam escaped?" Boromir slumped in relief before whispering in a sorrowful voice that was too low for anyone to hear or understand, “Merry and Pippin were taken.” He passed out. Aragorn could do what was needed to help him, but he wouldn't be able to answer any questions.

Legolas came running up. "What do you want me to do?"

"The arrows need to be removed," Aragorn answered. "I need bandages from our supplies. Clean water." Having removed the other man's tunic, he carefully placed Boromir on the ground, after checking to make sure none of the arrows had pierced through his back. While the wounds weren't deep, they were bleeding sluggishly; and removing the arrows without anything to hand to staunch the bleeding would result in a massive loss of blood.

Legolas nodded, quickly running to where their camp was to retrieve the needed supplies. He was back as soon as possible; it felt like too long. "The arrows; are they barbed or smooth? Pulling them out if they are barbed will tear his flesh more and it might be necessary to cut them out instead...."

"They are barbed." Aragorn quickly used some of the water to clean his hands and his dagger off. "So, they will need to be cut out." He frowned. "I would ask that you hold him steady, in case the pain causes him to thrash around and injure himself more."

"Of course." Legolas immediately shifted so that he was sitting on Boromir's legs, pinning the lower half of his body down.

Gimli arrived in that moment, taking in the scene quickly and moving to hold Boromir's arms immobile. "Frodo and Sam have taken one of the boats and are almost to the other side of the river. Will we be pursuing them or going our own way?" he asked grimly.

"It will be better if we go our own way," Aragorn answered. "I believe this is where the Fellowship will need to part." He began to work on Boromir, carefully cutting the shafts of the arrows before he began work on the heads themselves.

Boromir came too long enough to feel himself being sliced open, but he was too far gone to realize it was Aragorn trying to help him and thought it was the orcs getting ready to slice him up for eating. He began to thrash to break free, an agonized wail escaping before he passed out again.

Legolas and Gimli were both sweating by the time he passed out, the effort to hold him still taking a lot of effort.

Trusting Legolas and Gimli to keep Boromir still, Aragorn continued working, cleaning and bandaging each wound as soon as he cut the arrowhead out. He worked slowly and carefully, knowing the risk of infection and bleeding out was high.

Boromir came to only once more during the procedure, his eyes glassy and pained, but lucid enough to realize he was with friends. "...Frodo... Sam?" he asked weakly, his voice shaky with pain. He didn't care about himself. He only cared that the halflings had not been caught or hurt.

"They have left. The orcs don't have them." Aragorn spoke in a calm, reassuring tone as he finished bandaging the final wound.

"They escaped... that is good... I didn't bring harm to them at least..." he said in a broken tone, before passing out again.

Gimli gave Aragorn a confused look. "What did the lad mean by that?"

"The ring's influence has been particularly strong," Aragorn answered. As he'd finished bandaging the last of the wounds, he looked at his two conscious companions. "Would one of you bring a clean tunic from the supplies, please?"

Legolas nodded and quickly set off to bring the tunic.

Gimli was frowning slightly. "You think he tried to take the ring? That wouldn't have brought the orcs...."

"No. They'd been brought here by something else," Aragorn answered. "But Frodo ran because, I believe, Boromir attempted to take the ring. For good reason, perhaps, but the ring would twist any of that into something dark."

Gimli grunted. It wasn't like he hadn't been tempted. And man had fallen to the ring's corruption before. "He wasn't strong enough to resist. You know he will want to go after them... to protect them and make up for his folly."

"And we will not allow that, of course..." Legolas had returned in time to hear Gimli.

Aragorn nodded his agreement. "He needs to recover in any case. By the time he does, they will be too far ahead for him to catch up." Taking the tunic from Legolas, he carefully put it on Boromir.

"Do you have him? Or should I carry him?" Legolas asked.

"I can carry him," Aragorn answered, carefully lifting the unconscious Boromir into his arms.

***

Several days later of traveling as fast as they could go, and Boromir was glad when they reached the small settlement with an inn. It meant at least one night in an actual bed instead of the hard ground to sleep on. A chance to replenish their supply of healing herbs and bandages. A chance to drink away his guilt without putting the rest of the party at risk.

Plus, Aragorn and the rest could leave him safely and not feel guilt that they left his burdensome ass behind. He’d told them of Merry and Pippin as soon as he was able. They would be able to attempt a rescue of the little ones if he was not in the way.

Aragorn had quickly paid for the rooms for the night, choosing to share with Boromir, so he could check the other man's wounds. The food was hot, even if it was bland and tasteless. Most of his attention was taken up by Boromir, though. Watching to see if he would need to step in and stop the other man drinking himself into oblivion.

Boromir hadn't really paid much attention to how many rooms Aragorn had arranged, or who would be going where. He'd been more focused on going up to the bar and getting a pint. He only paid enough attention to know which room he needed to go to before he was ordering the alcohol, he hoped would drown out the demons that had been following him ever since he'd scared Frodo away. He hadn't told any of the rest of the party what had happened; he suspected they had figured it out, but unless they said something to him, he wasn't going to admit what he'd done. The only thing he could think to do in order to make up for his horrible actions was to continue whatever quest they were on and make sure Frodo had as much help to succeed as possible. If he admitted what he'd done, they might send him away.

Aragorn walked over to join Boromir, standing by the other man. "Drinking yourself into oblivion isn't going to help you feel any better," he said calmly.

"Maybe not... but it'll numb me for a bit..." Boromir grunted softly.

"I don't think that's what you need right now," Aragorn said seriously.

"You couldn't possibly know what I need right now..." Boromir muttered morosely. What he truly felt he needed was to find Frodo and go with the Halfling; to bear the brunt of outside forces that sought to punish the Hobbit for daring to try and destroy the one-ring. To be a buffer for the small being against the evil that was after him. That was beyond him, though. All he could do was fester in his own guilt and regret. There was no way he could ever make things up to Frodo.

Aragorn took the tankard from Boromir's hand and put it down, then grasped the other man's shoulder in a firm grip. "I know this isn't it. Come. Let us retire to our room and talk."

Giving Aragorn a disgruntled look and the tankard a last longing look, Boromir reluctantly stood to follow the leader of what remained of the fellowship. He was in no condition to fight the man and full well knew it.

Aragorn didn't speak as he guided Boromir to their room and inside, hardly sparing the single mattress a glance. He was used to poorer sleeping conditions, after all. He closed the door behind them and then turned to look at Boromir. "I don't believe I need to ask you what happened with Frodo."

Boromir swallowed hard, unable to face Aragorn. Looking at the ground, he didn't deny anything. "I couldn't bring myself to admit my guilt, even to ask if you knew..." he said faintly. "...If you no longer wish for me to be part of the Fellowship, I will leave; I only ask that you give me till the morning. The thought of leaving warm shelter so soon after entering it is more daunting than I would have thought it would be." Of course, leaving the Fellowship to face his guilt and know that he was fully alone, and it was his own fault was more daunting, but he wouldn't burden Aragorn with that.

Aragorn's hand still rested on the other man's shoulder and he squeezed gently. "Do not put words into my mouth. You were not the only one to feel the pull of the ring. Perhaps you were the first to give in, but I know your intentions were noble. You thought of doing good, not ill." Gentling his tone further, he added, "The ring's pull is seductive."

"I scared them! They should have been able to trust me, and I frightened them into leaving! And I failed to protect the... I failed!" Boromir finally broke down. His guilt had been held back by sheer willpower and determination... that was gone. He was injured. Weak. Heartsick. Unable to hide any longer.

Leading Boromir to the bed, Aragorn sat and pulled the other man down to sit next to him, wrapping both arms around Boromir in a tight embrace. "It was not your fault or your own doing. You might have frightened them, but you also gave them time to escape. And we still have the chance to rescue Merry and Pippin."

"How can you not hold me responsible? I let the ring cloud my judgement. I was weak and it caused them to run. And then...  Merry and Pippin... if I had been stronger, maybe...." Boromir started crying quietly, leaning into Aragorn's embrace, even as he protested the other man letting him off; not blaming him.

"It was not only your responsibility," Aragorn said, still holding onto Boromir. "We will find Merry and Pippin."

"How can you trust me after I gave in to the ring? After I was so weak?" Boromir asked, in a broken voice.

"You might have given in, but it was temporary, and we had all been affected by it," Aragorn said. "You are not at fault. But if you are having difficulty letting go of the guilt alone, I will help you."

"I wish you could help me... I failed so badly...." Boromir was still quietly crying, his tone hopeless.

Aragorn gently squeezed Boromir's shoulder again and then drew the other man over his lap, securing him in place before baring him. "You did not fail." He lifted his hand and brought it down firmly at the crest of Boromir's bottom. "The ring did get a hold on you, but it didn't linger." He delivered another smack to the other side. "You came back to yourself. You came back to us."

Boromir was too shocked at finding himself in such a position to fight at first. By the time the shock wore off enough for him to fight, he didn't want to fight. As far as he was concerned, he deserved worse for letting the ring overcome him. But maybe being punished in this manner would at least address some of his guilt. He reached down and cradled Aragorn's leg. "It feels as if I failed everyone..." he choked out.

"You did not," Aragorn stated firmly, keeping the swats at the same force and speed as he covered every inch of Boromir's bottom, down to his thighs, before starting over from the top. "You fought off the effects and continued to do the right thing. Frodo and Sam might be gone, but Merry and Pippin still have need of us. Still have need of you."

"I tried to keep them safe... to keep them from the orcs... I tried, Aragorn... I truly did!" Boromir began to sob grateful the other man did not blame him for failing at that as well.

"I know you did, and you succeeded. They were able to leave safely because of you." Aragorn began a third circuit of swats, a bit harder and faster, still holding firmly onto Boromir.

"But I couldn't keep them safe from me... and I couldn't save Merry and Pippin!" Boromir began to sob; quiet as he was, there was no other word for it. His body was shaking from the force of his tears.

"None of us were able to save Merry and Pippin then." Aragorn paused, letting his hand rest gently on Boromir's backside. "But working together, we will save them now. You overcame the call of the ring and were willing to sacrifice yourself to ensure Frodo and Sam's safety. You may have faltered, but you didn't fail. I promise you that."

Boromir could tell Aragorn truly believed that. While he wasn't fully convinced, still felt some guilt over what had occurred, Aragorn's belief, along with the punishment, helped ease that guilt. It also enabled him to let go. Slumping over Aragorn's lap, Boromir could do nothing but submit to his leader and accept his words as truth. "I will give everything in me to rescue them..." he whispered, the first hints of hope breaking through his tears.

"I will prove myself to you, my liege..." He swallowed as he also admitted to knowing the truth of who Aragorn really was. He wouldn't say anything, as Aragorn had his reasons for remaining quiet. But he knew who he was meant to obey. And it wasn't himself.

Aragorn carefully pulled Boromir's clothing back into place and gathered the other man into a tight embrace. "You have proven yourself to me already."

At those words, Boromir slumped against Aragorn, clinging to him and just crying out the remaining poison that had been his guilt. He didn't know if he'd ever fully trust himself again; he'd lost his confidence, but if Aragorn believed in him and trusted him, he had something to work towards.

The End