For Love, Not Duty

Summary: The night before Duncan leaves to go to Dune, he comes to Paul
Warning(s): Spoilers for the first book, Dune; AU; references to violence and sexual content
Pairing: Duncan Idaho/Paul Atreides
Author’s Note: Paul is aged up in this fic, so he’s 18 rather than 15

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A soft knock on his chamber door brought Paul’s attention from his studies at his desk. He raised his head and looked towards the door, cocking his head to one side and listening intently. Apart from the knock, he couldn’t make out any sounds. Taking a deep breath, he rose from the desk and walked towards the door. His pulse was racing, his heart beating fast, as he pulled open the door and took a step back.

Duncan was standing outside, in the hallway. His dark eyes swept over Paul’s face as he stepped forward, into the room. Without taking his gaze off Paul, he closed the door and moved right into Paul’s personal space. He leaned forward, breath wafting over Paul’s lips, hot and sweet, before kissing him.

Closing his eyes, Paul breathed Duncan in, raising his hands to grip the other man’s shoulders as he returned and deepened the kiss.

By the time they separated, Paul’s stomach was tied in knots. His skin felt flushed and warm. “I thought you were going to sleep early,” he murmured. “Since you’re returning to Arrakis in the morning.” He paused. Using that name of the planet didn’t feel quite right and he corrected himself. “Dune.”

“I didn’t want to leave without seeing you one last time,” Duncan replied. “After we arrive on Dune, we will have even less time to see each other. Virtually no time to see each other in private. Not like this.”

“We have little time enough to do that now,” Paul said quietly. “It’s going to be difficult, having to hide there.” He looked wistfully at Duncan’s face, drinking in the sight of the other man. Memorising his features. His stance. The graceful, feline way he moved. When he flicked his tongue over his lower lip, he could taste Duncan.

He wanted to be kissed again. He wanted to take the other man to his bed. To make the most of their final night together here on Caladan. He knew things would change when they reached Dune. He didn’t need to look at his dreams to know that. “I want you to come to my bed.” He spoke in a quick, rushed tone. “Tonight. For the last time.”

“We still have to hide our relationship,” Duncan said, looking into Paul’s eyes. “We can’t let the Duke, can’t let your father know. Even if he would understand and accept it, it would cause too many problems politically.”

Paul took in a deep, sudden, sharp breath. Those words made him think Duncan was considering breaking their relationship off. Maybe that would be easier in the long term. After all, when Paul did eventually marry, he was going to have to do so in a way that would be advantageous to him and the Atreides family. He could never marry the one he loved. In that way, he was as trapped as his father.

“I know….” Duncan cleared his throat and reached out, clasping hold of Paul’s hands. His grip was warm and firm; his gaze hot and intense. “We can’t marry openly, Paul. But after tomorrow, everything will change. If you are willing, I’d like to make our relationship official. Even if it’s only us who know that it is.”

His heart raced faster and Paul turned his hands over to grip Duncan’s. “You’re asking me to marry you?” he whispered, a lump forming in his throat as sudden emotion made his chest tight.

“Yes.” Duncan’s eyes searched his face. “It’s not possible to be together publicly, but even if we’re the only ones who know about it….”

“Yes.” Paul gripped Duncan’s hands tighter. He gave a short, quick laugh, relief washing through him at the words. It made him feel really good inside, the thought of being bound to the older man in such a way. He glanced down at their clasped hands as he asked, “How long until we can make the arrangements?”

“All we need to do is walk to the training arena.” Duncan pulled back, slowly, letting go of Paul’s hands. “Everything is already arranged.”

Paul caught his breath and then smiled. “You were that sure I’d say yes?”

“I hoped you would say yes.” Duncan reached out and opened the door, stepping out into the hallway.

Paul walked out behind the older man, closing the door quietly behind him. “I feel like I should be dressed smarter for this.” He tugged self-consciously at his clothes. He hadn’t changed into his nightshirt, but the clothes he was wearing weren’t formal enough for such an occasion as his marriage, even if it was happening secretly.

Duncan paused and looked at Paul, smiling at him. In a voice pitched low enough to only carry between them, he said, “You look fine. More than fine.” His gaze travelled the length of Paul’s body, heat in his eyes.

A warm pit formed in Paul’s stomach. When Duncan looked at him like that, as if he was the only person that existed. They would be apart when Duncan returned to Dune and to the Fremen, but if they were married…if they were bound in such a way…then he’d know, he’d believe, deep in his heart, in his soul, that the separation would only be temporary. If they were married, he’d know that Duncan would return to him.

There was no one else in the hallway and even when he extended his senses to their fullest, he couldn’t feel or hear any signs of anyone approaching who might look at him or Duncan in the wrong way. So he felt safe in leaning forward and catching Duncan’s lips in a quick, firm kiss.

It made him remember the first time they’d done this. The first time they’d kissed. The first time he’d kissed Duncan, because the older man had never responded to Paul’s more subtle attempts at seduction. He knew that Duncan had been reluctant to act on their mutual attraction. It was Paul who’d had to make the first move; to convince Duncan that he wasn’t taking advantage of Paul’s youth or inexperience.

Those thoughts all went through Paul’s mind within seconds as he slowly pulled back from the kiss, his tongue flicking out to taste Duncan on his lips. He smiled at Duncan and whispered, “I love you. Thank you for this.”

Duncan shook his head, a look of wonder passing across his face. “I should be the one thanking you. I never expected anything like this to happen between us.”

“Is that why you’ve always had such a reputation as a ladies man?” Paul forced a smile, but he couldn’t help a slight twinge of jealousy as he thought about it. As he remembered seeing Duncan with women, flirting with them and often doing more. He knew that, after they’d formed their relationship, Duncan had only taken those actions to keep up appearances. Still. It was hard not to feel jealous of those who had the attention of the man he loved.

But just like tying them together would help him believe that Duncan would come back to him…being married also meant that he would better be able to ignore the times the older man flirted with and gave attention to women. Because he’d know that they were tied together in a way that no one else could experience with Duncan Idaho.

“No one else has the kind of hold on me that you do.” Duncan’s voice was quiet but earnest. “And whenever I’ve given attention to others, whenever I’ve flirted with others, it hasn’t meant anything. It’s only been to hide how I truly feel about you.”

Paul looked into his eyes; studied his body language. But he couldn’t see any sign or hint of a lie and he relaxed. His mother had taught him to know when someone was lying to him. To look for the tiny clues and hints given away by someone who was speaking or acting falsehoods.

There were none in Duncan’s voice or behaviour.

Paul nodded and smiled at the older man. He saw no need to say anything else and fell into step beside Duncan; walking close enough that their bodies were brushing side by side, but far enough away that he could claim it was an accident if anyone approached and became suspicious.

They reached the training arena without any incidences or interruptions and Duncan stepped through the door first.

Paul followed and looked around as they stepped inside.

They were all there. Thufir, Gurney, even Doctor Yueh. All gathered around. The lights were dim, casting shadows across the arena that danced and played, creating patches of light to guide the path towards….

Paul swallowed hard as he saw his mother, standing there. He walked next to Duncan, approaching the Lady Jessica. “You knew about this too?”

She smiled and reached out to touch his face. “Did you really think that you could hide something like this from me?”

“Father?” Paul asked.

“He can’t know about this.” His mother looked solemnly at him. “This has to be kept a secret from everyone apart from those who are here.”

Paul nodded and gripped Duncan’s hand. He turned to face the older man and prepared to bind their lives together, surrounded by almost all of those who were the most important to him.

The End